Dreams

Last night I had an awful dream. I dreamt that all of my babies died, right in front of me. I woke up and my heart literally hurt, I could barely catch my breath. I almost instantly thought of the sorrow God must have felt as His Son was upon the cross, absorbing the wrath of God for sin. I was reminded of what a great sacrifice it was, and how vile and horrible sin is. I'm thankful that in Jesus' death, burial, and resurrection, he has ransomed for Himself all who would repent and trust in His work on the cross. Thank you Father for this reminder, I need it often.

For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. 2 Corinthians 5:21

VBS week....check!

We survived the week of VBS! This year I taught 1st and 2nd grade. It was a wonderful group of kids, and I really enjoyed it! We basically covered the birth, childhood, temptation, death and resurrection,  and ascension of Jesus over 5 days. It was very, very gospel saturated. My house suffered all week, so I was very ready to get up this morning and clean it. All I've got left is laundry now. Kaylee has been so sweet, and asking what she can do to help me. :)
Josiah started to stand by himself for a second or two this week, and started saying his version of Kaylee. I can't believe he is almost a year old!
Next week Brian is taking a few days off, so I'm REALLY excited to spend some time with him. :)

Ahhhh...sleep!!

I'm proud to announce that after nearly a year, Josiah is FINALLY sleeping through the night! At least this week he is. ;) It could be because of late night's due to vbs... but I'll take it! I think this week at vbs is also going to be helpful in the weaning process. He hasn't been nursing nearly as often this week. My little guy is growing up!! :)

Why do I need a title anyways?! ;)

Just wanted to jot a few things down.
Kaylee and Brian stayed at their Papa's house this Thursday night, and we picked them up Saturday. I was so lost without them! Even though they drive me crazy with fighting and bickering most days, the house was too quiet without them. *Edited to add a story. While at Papa and Grandma's house, the kids were offered a coke. We don't give them coke, everyone knows that. Kaylee said no, we aren't supposed to drink coke. Now, it wouldn't be the end of the world if they drank it, we just prefer they not. So her Grandma told her " You're at Grandma's house, it will be ok." My sweet little girl still refused, she knew she wasn't supposed to. I'm so very proud of her. She had the opportunity to do something against our wishes without our knowing, but chose not to. I'm thankful for the character she is developing. <br>
Brian took me on a date this weekend. We went to dinner and a movie. It was nice to spend time with him. I think it is so important for parents to get some time alone. Not just after the kids to go bed, but intentional time where you can enjoy each others company. I don't want to go through life raising kids, and wind up strangers when the kids leave home because we didn't take time to ourselves.
Josiah started saying "dada". FINALLY!! :) We have been working on that for months now! I can't believe the little guy is going to be a year old soon. I wanted to throw him a big party at the park, but waited too long and everything is booked. I'm not sure what to do now, but I'm thinking of just doing a small party at home, mainly with family.
VBS is this week, and I'm teaching 1st and 2nd grade. I'm NERVOUS. lol. I always get nervous.
I can never think of blog titles. Can you tell? ;)

And so it begins..

Yesterday I had to have a long talk with Kaylee about things that seem beyond her age. She was talking about crushes (even though she has no clue what that even means), I caught her playing "switch boyfriends" with her barbies, and once I walked in and caught her wearing a shirt as a really short dress. I think the last one bothered me the most. I asked her why she was doing that and she told me she wanted to be "girly". I asked what that meant, and she told me she wanted to be pretty. I asked her why she would think that makes her pretty and she told me because she sees women dress like that. It made me sad that at 6 she has already bought into the idea that beauty is merely external, and that less is more when it comes to clothing. I had a long talk with her about boys, dating and God's design in marriage, modesty and what God says true beauty is. I don't want her to follow after this world and it's ways. I don't want to overreact, but I also don't want her to continue on in thinking that her beauty depends on what she wears and how much she shows. Please pray for me, that I would be a good example to her, and that I can diligently teach her what scripture says beautiful is.

Change

Josiah has been changing so much lately!! He is learning new little things that excite me a little too much lol. Last week he started walking behind his walker, using a chair at church as a walker, clapping, saying "mmm" when he eats something good, throwing the basketball in the goal of his toy, and trying to copy the noise when Brian blows his nose. It's just an amazing experience to see them learning and discovering new things. Last week we had a playdate with some friends. There was a splashpad and 2 little pools. Jo loved the water! He was quite the handful that day, and required close attention, but he really had a fun time playing.

Life as I know it

I have been SO busy lately! For months now I've been waiting for things to get "back to normal", but I'm finally coming to the realization that maybe busy IS the new normal. I'm learning to be content with that. I'm learning that means I'll have to keep my priorities straight if I plan to balance things properly. Unfortunately that means that housework is a higher priority and things like blogging are a much lower priority. I wanted to post about some recent things though, because it has been a crazy, busy couple of weeks, but well worth documenting.
Friday before last Brian's mom came to watch Josiah, and Brian, Bubs, Kaylee and I all headed to Schlitterbahn in Galveston to meet some good friends of ours and spend the day. I had so much fun, probably the most fun I've had all year! It was great to spend some time just playing with my babies, and enjoying the company of my husband and friends. It's been awhile since we had a fun day out like that, and we've never been able to ride things all together because someone was always too small. The kids really enjoyed themselves, and I definitely see us going back again.
The next day one of my best friends got married, and I was in her wedding! She made a beautiful bride, and I was thankful to be able to share this day with her. She was in my wedding too. It's crazy that we are all grown up now! While getting my hair done, the lady asked me how long I've known her, and I realized that it has been about 13 years! We helped set up and clean up for her reception, and it was so sweet to watch how hard Kaylee worked. That little girl is so precious, and truly LOVES to help people. It warms my heart to see her be so willing to help in any way she can.
Thursday was Kaylee's 6th birthday! Okay...it was mine too, but I tend to forget about that. I spend so much time and effort preparing for Kaylee's birthday that I forget I'm having one too. I'm okay with that. ;) Thursday we went and ate donuts for breakfast (per her request!). Chrissy came by at lunch and brought us both a sweet card, and a sweet treat! :) We had family over for dinner, and my mom made her girls their favorite, Chicken and dumplings! We opened presents, at cupcakes, and enjoyed each others company. Her favorite gifts this year were her barbie car and her Ken doll (Thanks, Uncle Fred!) Friday we had our first slumber party! I found a cute idea on Pinterest to do a movie night. So I set up a concession stand complete with sugary drinks, pizza, popcorn, and chocolate. I had made each of the girls a shirt that said B.F.F on it, and gave them silly string, play money (for the concession stand) and a ticket for the movie. Kaylee loved it, and asked if we can do it every year for her birthday. ;) The girls didn't make it all the way through the movie before they were ready to go play outside, so outside we went. They played on the swings, in the dirt, and with bugs...you know, all the fun stuff girls do at sleepovers. ;) Then we came in, showered, brushed hair, and read a book. They were giggly and playing until about 10:30, when I finally had to sit there until they all fell asleep. :) 6:08 the next morning (I know, because Mia had apparently looked at the clock) the girls woke up. By 6:30 they were all up in full play mode. We ate donuts, and headed to the beach! We were worried we wouldn't be able to make it because it might rain, but the weather was perfect for the beach! The girls had a great time! I'm so thankful for such sweet friends for my babies, and for me! I'm thankful that their parents entrusted me with them for the night. I'm thankful for my super amazing husband who is such a trooper, and helps out SO much! I'm thankful for my wonderful mother who watched my boys so I could spend some time with my girl...and who gave birth to me! ;) I'm thankful for my sweet baby girl and every single day that I get to spend with her. Most of all, I'm thankful for the grace of God, and every blessing he has given me. =)

In honor of finishing first grade!

Dear Kaylee,

We just finished our first official year of homeschooling! Yay!! Since we did a pre-k/kindergarten curriculum (unknowingly) that would prepare you for first grade, we decided to skip kindergarten and just start on first grade. While we were shopping for curriculum, we found that we had already covered everything in the kindergarten curriculum, and that we would just need to improve on reading a bit to be on track, so we bought the book "Teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons". You've done exceedingly well, very rarely struggling to learn anything. I'm amazed at how easily you grasp things, and how quickly you learn. You'll say you hate school, but something tells me that isn't entirely true. You don't see the way your face lights up when you get almost all of the answers right, or how fascinated you are by learning new things. If you struggle, even a little bit, you're ready to give up and walk away. That is your biggest downfall, and that is what makes you hate it. You learn the most in the middle of the struggle-that is a life lesson that is applicable in a lot of situations. I know it seems difficult, and sometimes easier to just walk away, but struggles are the way we grow. You'll use that advice in school, and in life, I promise. This year has by far been one of the hardest years for me. You are strong willed (much like your momma) and you gave me a lot of difficult days. On most days, we could finish school in 2 1/2 to 3 hours. On good days, it would be 1 1/2 or 2. On really bad days, it would be 4 or more. This year has not come and gone without yelling, tears (from both of us!), spankings, groundings, and losing toys. We also had countless smiles, giggles, field trips, rewards, prayers, and hands on teaching moments. You've learned how to add, subtract, fractions, homonyms, synonyms, antonyms, a LOT of spelling, and so much more! You've also taught me a lot about myself. You've shown me how unloving and impatient I can be. You've shown me that I am often selfish, and I am in great need of grace. While I wouldn't admit it in those moments, I am thankful for that. I am thankful that by the grace of God, I'm not who I was when we started this year. Second grade, Lord willing, will be better. I'm so thankful for the opportunity to be your mom and teacher. It isn't always pretty. Homeschooling is a difficult task at times, but so very worth it. I love seeing you learn, I love teaching you, and I love spending so much time together. I love you, sweet girl. More than you'll ever know.

Love,

Mom